Good News from Oz!

I had to smile yesterday as I sat in my chiropractor's waiting room. On the TV screen was "The Wizard of Oz", and it was the scene where Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion were ushered in to the presence of the Wizard of Oz...but something was going wrong with his projection screen and they saw the man at the controls, who cried out "Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain!"

On this unexpected journey that I'm on, there really isn't a wizard behind a curtain trying to be something he is not. My orthopedic surgeon makes it very clear that he has no idea what the outcome regarding my knee will be. He doesn't try to "be God" and act like he can fix it or see into the future. And I'm not looking to him to do that.

But it WAS with a good deal of anticipation that John and I went to a recent appointment to see Dr. Moscovitz. It had been 12 weeks of being completely off my left leg, followed by 12 days of very slight weight-bearing, and still no pain of any kind! What would Dr. M. say?

Good news! First of all, the good doctor was so surprised about the "no pain"...and pleased! He broke into a big grin and kept poking my knee saying "Does this hurt?" and when I'd say "No", he'd poke some more and say "Are you sure it doesn't hurt? Really?"

Still acknowledging that he really doesn't know what's happening inside my knee, he said that he was so happy with how I was doing.... and, with a laugh, said "I think you may have cheated me out of a surgery!" He explained that there are three possible outcomes:
1. a very tiny chance that my knee will completely heal
2. the possibility that there will be no healing, and the pain and disability will be chronic
3. the middle ground ("This is where I'm pretty sure you'll land, Joanna")- my knee will be OK most of the time and sometimes will give me trouble, which John says is always true of his knee!

Dr. M. also agreed to order another MRI at some point down the road and he left us with another laugh and smile and "You don't need to come in and see me unless the pain returns and, as a matter of fact, I don't ever want to see you again!" :-)

Now under the guidance of my chiropractor, I am slowly and gradually adding weight and distance while I continue to be on my crutches. Every other day I can "walk" around the block! Next week I hope to be able to begin "water walking" in the pool, which will be the first time walking without crutches since July.

Still no pain, except for a little muscle soreness now and then which actually feels really good...

Thank God for a doctor who trusts in the miracle of a body that can heal itself, just as it was created to do. And thank you for your continuing prayers and encouragement...I will keep you posted every couple of weeks or so on how the journey is going.

Have a blessed Christmas!

Love,
Joanna

Learning to Walk in the Dark

Have you ever gone for a midnight hike? You know, you are out there with your flashlight so you can see your way and then, at some point you decide to turn off that beam of light and allow yourself to be surrounded by the deep darkness. It's not an evil, scary foreboding darkness....but that blanket of night that surrounds you so completely that you can't even see your hand in front of your face.

This is the image that has come to mind this week as I've literally taken the next steps on this unexpected journey in an unfamiliar land. As I leave the quiet and pain-free interlude of the last several weeks and start weight-bearing on my affected leg, it feels as if I am in that darkness, where I can't even see where my next step is to go. I don't know if I am walking into a miracle or a disability!

Today is the 7th day of weight-bearing  and I'm literally learning to walk again (still on crutches) after 3 months of keeping that foot off the floor. Learning to walk in the dark...

I'm only allowed to put 30 pounds of pressure there when I step down (which is hardly anything it turns out!), but I must tell you how good it feels to have both feet on the ground...

I was told to expect some level of discomfort or pain after the first two or three days...at the very least muscle, ligament and tendon pain from lack of use...and at the most, all that plus the bone pain of osteonecrosis if there hasn't been any healing. The good news at this early stage is that I have had NO pain whatsoever! Whether this will continue or not, no one knows, but it is an encouraging beginning for which John and I are very thankful.

We are thankful for the water exercise classes which have helped me prepare my leg for walking. I've been able to get back my range of motion and stop the muscle atrophy. My leg feels as if it's in the best shape it could be at this point!

We are thankful for YOU...for your prayers for healing and hope, which mean so much to us on this journey!

And we are thankful for the presence of our loving God in each moment (dark or light!) on this path. Whatever lies ahead, we feel ready to face it...whether I am walking into a miracle or a disability, we know that we don't walk alone.

Blessings,
Joanna